In this fast paced world of ours, where everything is measured by a capitalist society that values money above all else; the expectation of motherhood can become lost in a deep fog of confusion and uncertainty. The crushing blow of responsibility is shocking to all new mothers……Having a baby is a huge moment in a mother’s life and a challenging time for the new Dad. The very root of our civilization is dependent upon the loving arms of a mother in the first months of life. We are nothing without our young mothers. Absolutely nothing. Their dedication is the seed of humanity and life as we know it. And yet, respect for this incredibly difficult task still remains allusive.
A solid foundation in the early years of development is essential for the human child to know themselves later, as adults. Children are responsible for our continued evolution and yet society rarely takes this seriously. Every single moment spent as an infant; in the loving arms of a mother, ensures positive brain development in the baby. If society treated mothers with as much respect as they deserve, the world would be a better place. It’s that simple. Don’t complicate the issue. Young mothers deserve our respect.
So how do we measure this intangible and subjective experience? Short answer is, we don’t. For many children, the formative years are best left to the imagination. Child development has always been a source of frustration for me, because I have seen hundreds of kids at all different stages of life, and never felt that measurement was meaningful or helpful in any way. Babies are so beautiful and develop at their own speed. Young Mothers are the experts here and should be encouraged to beat to their own drum, particularly in the first few weeks of life. Young moms need affirmation, understanding and encouragement from all family members in order to thrive.
This painting by my daughter, Sarah captures a very special moment in my life……I have never been so happy to see my daughters who are raising two children each – My goodness, I thought motherhood was challenging until I saw them in action. They have both done their very best! My job as Grandma, was to listen and encourage. This isn’t always easy because so many moments reminded me of my own experiences. Now, I am seeing other young people in the family embracing their new roles as parents. I am so proud of all of them.
I still believe it takes a village to raise the “whole child” to adulthood; and for that I have personally thanked a few people in their lives who helped Jenny and Sarah thrive and accomplish their goals. However, when it comes to newborns, I strongly believe it is the new mother who needs the attention, not the baby. The baby is most often in very capable hands. I have always thought that baby showers should be replaced by a shower of presents for the parents, including cash. And “Young Moms With Newborns” should be paid a salary, on top of whatever pay they might be getting for maternity leave. New moms deserve support from a trained midwife and they deserve respect from our society at large.
Kathryn Kastner 